Bill's Blog - January 23rd, 2012
NEWS OF THE WILD

Oh dear the guilt. A little bird has been squawking in my ear lately, accusing me of not keeping up my blogging duties. "Oh come on" I retorted "its only a week or two since the last one." To prove it, I visited my own website. Oh boy did I blush. My last blog was not two weeks ago, it was two months! Well we old fellas get confused. Days, weeks, months, years, even decades and centuries, the older I get the less I want to have anything to do with time. Except it is time for a new blog.

AND A NEW YEAR

New Year. What's that all about? Feels just like the old one to me. The 2012 government is being just as arrogantly bloody minded as they were in 2011. They seem to have got the concept and purpose of consultation completely wrong. For example, a Badger cull. A majority of those consulted are against it, either on wildlife morality grounds, or because it almost certainly won't work. All of which surely adds up to a "no". So the government say "yes".

After the annual festive eruption of scarlet faced and coated “sportsmen” urging their hounds to terrify fleeing foxes, there is a call from the Countryside Alliance and such to repeal the law against hunting with dogs, "because" they say "it is unworkable".

What on earth does that mean?! Are they saying the law won't work because they intend to defy it? Or are they admitting that is extremely difficult to control a pack of ravenous hounds once they have scented blood? So let 'em do it! Or are they confessing that the current practice of sending in a bird of prey to finish off the fox is decidedly dodgy. How often have I heard of a British raptor snatching a healthy fox? I’ll tell you. Never. Need I also tell you that a large majority of the public are totally opposed to so called "blood sports".

But what did a government spokesperson say? "We are minded to reconsider the laws against hunting with dogs".

HIGH SPEED AHEAD

Thirdly - and most outrageously, the biggest most mind boggling, idiotic, refusal to take notice of "consulation" since Blair invaded Iraq. HS2.

The proposed High Speed rail line from London to Birmingham, which will destroy many valued areas of British countryside and demolish a considerable number of peoples' dwellings, cost a staggeringly large amount of money (at a time when most us know all too well there isn’t much around), will provide a service aimed blatantly at business people who can afford exorbitant ticket prices, and will knock about 15 minutes off the journey between London and Birmingham. Wow! Quarter of an hour! Well, that’s certainly worth wrecking a few landscapes and bringing hell and disruption to many peoples lives.

SHOWING OFF

Some blokes show off their wealth and boost their butchness by driving an expensive fast flash car. This government wants a High Speed Train. Wheeee! Personally, what I want is for them to sort out the unintelligible fare structures. As it happens, I have to go to Birmingham tomorrow. I shall go on a train. I always go on a train if I can. The journey is due to take 1 hour 24 minutes. If it takes another 10 minutes, that’s fine with me. I can have another coffee, read a few more pages of Mojo Magazine, or even do a little work. Actually, I reckon 2 hour train journeys are perfect. I might get a little nap in too. In fact, if we are a quarter of an hour late tomorrow, I really won't mind. However, one thing I am certain of, I do not wish to get there 15 minutes quicker!

NOT NATURAL

What was that excellent slogan? "Let the Train Take the Strain". At 200 mph?! No thanks, it ain't natural. The construction of HS2 certainly won't ease strain or stress, but it won't half cause plenty.

GIVE IT A TRY

In late December or early January it is tediously traditional for journalists to publish a retrospective collection of Top Tens for the year that has just passed. They are often intended to be funny or witty and just as often they are neither. So I am not going to try. There’s a relief for us all. What I will do though is offer up a few of the things that I enjoyed or admired in 2011 in the hope that you may have the cosy satisfaction of agreeing, or the pleasure of discovering something new, or at least giving it a try.

DRINK

Recommended tipple: Tap water.
It tastes fine and does you good, so don’t bother with the bottled stuff. Get a water meter fitted. You'll maybe be amazed how much less your water bills are, especially if you take showers instead of baths. You can drink as much as you like without pushing the price up.